Temple of the Nerd

(Or What's Really Upsetting The Fans!)

Oh Amy, what have you done
Turning these droids into porn-slave chums 

You 'chewing' on a light saber
Didn't know that was quite possible!

Are you insane?
Taking on Disney and its Star Wars gang

You will live on in infamy
They will boycott your films for an eternity

But wasn't that what you were?
A space tripping Playboy Bunny slur?

I take it you ain't all that pretty
Or even alluringly sexy

But you should have taken it slow
Polish up an affectious, angelic glow

Like, what's her name?
Renee Swollenankles Not-Looking-Same?

Yup, that gal in Bridget Jones Diary
The one that got Hugh Grant the Smarmy

But too late now
The Force Has Awaken you crazy cow!

You better run, you better hide
Or hey, do something to Vader the fans might like

Tie him up and spank him hard
Turn him into a porn-addict retard

50 Shades of Grey
Into 50 Shades of Empire Decay

That might score some points
Move you back up at the rebel joint

So, please, no more tweaky dick or finger lick
You'll drive the Star Wars fans more sick

Respect is always earned at the front of lines
With a laser blast that's always so very fine!

Not the sleaze of porn with familiar characters
It's like incest with your bros and grandfather

Cut it out, cut it out
My eyes burn to see that rot

It's not Disney I want
It's the nerd universe minus the whoring cunt

For it is the temple of the nerd
That you have sullied without a word

The Temple of the Nerd
The Holy Grail of all that academic work

So don't give it on a platter
With nerd bros that matter

Androids or not
Or a hairy bear of sorts (Chewy)

The Star Wars universe is sacrosanct
So shall the Temple of the Nerd remain at distance

The end - TC Lai