Once They Were Firm

I once had a chest that bounced off light
Now I have a chest that raises a baby's delight

I had it start all scrawny and ribbed
That carried me through adolescence like a bib

I then had pecs, no thanks to NS
All that chin-up, monkey bar and physical duress

I again discovered my manly chest
Dating girlfriends who whispered as they rest

I was quite happy to let it go
Soft as a pillow, for a baby I came to know

I heaved my chest over the years
To build a family from sweat, joy, tears

I carelessly ate and let the chest fat in
Now it is pasty, squishy and looking s'been

I once had a chest firm and sculpted
It now has mounds, a teenager's adulterated

I know the words for them but cannot voice
It is feminine, pubescent and dare say I, a joy?

I know, "WTF, WTF, WTF..."
Am I in love with my own manboobs club?

I cup them like soft unbaked dough
And feel a rise right down below

I care not now for the Pams and Jos
When my own manboobs taunt me sexily so

I was titillated but for a sec
Of what it means to own the opposite sex

I wonder what the other guys also think
Of a pair of small jugs, okay, looking thin

I shake my head and go "Nah!"
Better go get that manboob bra

I might not look good in a tee anymore
But do I want a race of Tits-to-the-Floor?

I once had a chest that bounced off light
Now I have a chest that raises a baby's delight

- by TC Lai

Sand In My Butt

I have sand in my butt
From I know not whence

I have sand in my butt
And it's making me tense

I have sand in my butt
Why should that be?

I have sand in my butt
Did I chop someone's tree?

I have sand in my butt
Was it a place I liked?

I have sand in my butt
That won't remove, I've tried

I have sand in my butt
That keeps reminding me

I have sand in my butt
Oh please, set me free!

- by TC Lai

All I Need Today

In these turbulent times of now

When farmers are even missing cows

So my milk goes a little sour

And life and dreams stutter for a while

The light in my fridge flickers on

Shining a little bare and upon

Not much, some scraps some bits

How much of a hunger will they meet?

Then a knock on the door

And feet sounds on the floor

Friends have come a-calling

What surprises are they now abearing?

A love of ham, a hand of eggs

Things cooked, things baked

They throw open my fridge

And stuff it full and make it peach

Oh, I am starved no more

For friends always come ashore

At times when one feels stranded

Their gaiety have always amended

What I might thirst or hunger

What that fortunes cannot aplunder

It's the presence of their beings

Of laughter, jokes and knee-slapping

It's when with them I hunger not

Even when my stomach is all in a knot

My heart and mind is leaven

Who cares if my fridge is not a heaven

All I need....are for friends to be around

Especially today when old friends are found

- by TC Lai

=== Note ===
The above poem was inspired by a friend's birthday poem below:

What's a birthday without birthday cheers
What's a cheer without friends and peers
Friends of old and friends of new
Peers of then and peers in queue
Friends who cares not what you are
But friends who care of who you are
Friends who see you ever so often
Or those who see you perhaps once upon
It no matter 'coz time waits for no man
And the sun no longer just give you a tan
Pigmentation and old-age spots starts apopping
But nothing beats good old friends who comes a-knockin
Happy Birthday TC
And may your birthday be filled with sweet memories
May Our Lord keep you safe, healthy and wise
To walk together in yours and your loved ones lives
God bless- Angie Cheang

I Have

This is a rhyming poem/game you can recite/play with a child. :-)


I have a bone
This bone is mine
I have a watch
This watch is time

I have a dress
This dress is fine
I have a sneeze
And this sneeze is slime

I have a bag
This bag is Kline
I have a doll
And this doll is blind

I have a dustbin
This dustbin is grime
I have a mystery
And this mystery is crime


I have a picture
This picture is pretty
I have a sofa
And this sofa is dirty

I have a TV
This TV is pricey
I have a bear
And this bear is cutesy

I have a mouse pad
This mouse pad is Hello Kitty
I have a parrot
And this parrot is silly

I had a hamster
This hamster was cuddly
I have a stomach
And this stomach is hungry

- by TC Lai

Balloons They Were All, Once

I saw a cartoon the other day
That had a balloon talking
It got insecure and then shrunk
I thought how apt an action that was
Don't we all feel small one time or other?

It's when I realised the balloon a good metaphor
For Life, for whom we are
We too start out life flat....Nine months later
Our mommies' tummies are inflated
Like a balloon

That balloon then shrinks and here we are
Baby fat and all, like some tube balloon twisted
The same kind that clowns make animals out of
Only now, our parents have made them into us

And then we grow

Sometimes we stay level
Other times our ego inflate
Most times we see what we can only see
That high we can only float

It is only when we go higher
That we learn of other things
Our minds expand
Our vision become inclusive

Isn't that how one must grow?
Isn't that how a balloon must expand the higher it goes?

The knowledge that it fills itself
The environment that makes it so

Finally, the balloon rises too much and pops
We too grow old and die

The pieces of balloon fall to the ground
We are buried in the ground

But for the balloon, it probably made a child happy once
Who, in his glee, had let it go
How about that old man?
Did he have a child he once made happy
And let go?

Fathers and sons
Mothers and daughters
Balloons they were all, once

- by TC Lai

A Woman to Avoid

There's a kind of woman, all thinking men should avoid
The pretty, coy and acquiescent type

Her prettiness is nice to look at
But may not tell the whole story

Her coyness may seem adorable
But is actually social ineptness

Her acquiescence may be subservient
But could be unvoiced disagreement

That someday will come back to bite

Find a woman who's prettiness
Stems from a glow, a kind of disposition

Find a woman who's coyness
Means well from less than more

Find a woman who's acquiescence
Is actually an act of agreement, not surrender

That helps to move your lot along in life

A woman who has bandwidth
A woman who has intelligence
A woman whose judgement you can trust

A woman can be all that and yet
Be seemingly pretty, coy and acquiescent

A woman I once knew but now lost

- by TC Lai

What is Happening to Me?

What is happening to me?

I used to see a woman for what she is

Her intelligent eyes; her purposeful lips; and her curious nature

Now, my eyes seek out a svelte bottom; a fluted ankle; a perky breast

What is happening to me?

I know I don't love them less

I know I don't respect them less

I just seem to appreciate them in parts

What IS happening to me?

It does not seem to matter who

Whether she is smart, talkative or soulful; Or careless with her affections

I am drawn, like a man who loves his designer togs, furniture, and gadgets

For in them too exist many planes of beauty seen from near, far, and askew

Really, what is happening to me?

In the past, I would gladly hold on to a woman I could love for an eternity

If I could love her smile, her voice, her little gestures. I could overlook her less than perfect sum

A woman that I would cuddle on a rainy day, tease and doodle

What is happening to me?

That I am now content to wax lyrical of just her and her certain features

That I don't mind her being silent to me, clueless or blank

Has age turned, changed me?

To things just pretty and candy

What's happening to me?

Is this what Second Childhood is all about

Where once I was also taken by things pretty, perky, and sharp?

Of a time that's uncomplicated; that was happy; and yet, oh, so gratifying still?

A time of infatuation

What is happening to me?

That the scent of a woman could draw me along, float me along - drunk

Is it because I am old but young; old and still longing; seeking?

Or am I like a ill old man grasping at pills

A pill that's shaped like a svelte behind; a pill that's shaped like fluted bones

A pill that's shaped like cupped flesh

So that I may live again

What is happening to me?

That I seek such new and strange ways to love

- by TC Lai